Sunday, July 4, 2010

Two Years Ago Today.

July 4, 2008. I woke to a thin film of nausea covering my body. Rolling over in bed, I realized the sun was streaming hot through our bathroom window and pooling on the floor by my bed. I also noticed, rolling over, that my stomach seemed to do two or three extra rolls, then spin to an uneasy stop. "Unnng," I groaned. "What?" Darrick asked.

"I just feel so nauseous."
"Go take a test."

So I did. And before I even took the test I just knew I would be seeing two lines. We were cautiously giddy. Ready for a second kid, but in a tough spell in life and both probably wishing it would take a few months longer. That's the bare truth, and yet seems so silly to me now. But I was scared we'd decided to have second too soon. And then there was the torture of going about our normal day and pretending things were...well...normal. We went to a Fourth of July party where I pretended to drink alochol-laden punch and avoided eye contact with good friends I was dying to spill the news to.

The week went by and we made contacts with midwives and I nervously fretted over how to share the news with my boss, when to tell family and friends, and how I would manage with two. I was so nervous over a toddler and a newborn at the same time. I had no idea how I would manage...if we could manage.

Two years later, and I simply cannot get over how lucky I feel, and how right our family feels with Rohan in it. I have never met a boy whose face radiates such joy and pure love the way his does. I look at him and I can't help but smile. He's not always perfect. He throws a mean temper tantrum for a boy of only 15 months. He has been known to hit and steal toys from other kids. And he definitely was not the easiest baby on the block. But he's so full of love and joy and life and nothing gets this kid down it seems. I always wondered how I would feel about having a son once I was already a mom to a girl, and I now know the answer: like the luckiest mom in the world.

All photos courtest of Canyon Photography.

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