At 12 Months

At 12 months, our Rohan is as big as he is loving.

25 lb, 3 oz (80th %)
32 inches (97th % +)

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This weekend he 'helped' with his first tie dye project. Or...more accurately...he was rounded up by my husband as Luca, some of her buddies, and some of my friends helped us tie dye some clothes and color my backyard grass. It was a day full of sunshine, cuddles, cupcakes and fruit, and lots of fun and friends!

And the tie dye? OH how lovely!!











He spent most of Sunday toddling around the house, on sea legs that grew sturdier and surer as the day went on. Victims of his newfound bravery included 2 soda cans, a (thankfully cold from sitting out all morning)cup of coffee, and an empty beer bottle (and an empty box that used to hold beers). He nearly bounced down the stairs as well and had I not been rightthere he may have found a new appreciation for gravity. But it hasn't deterred him and once this boy decides he's going to do something, it is going to get done. In one day he transformed from a baby who braved the ocassional spattering of drunken steps from object to object into a Big Boy Who Likes To Walk And Is Frighteningly Close To Running.



Hold me.



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We make a point when Rohan is taking his morning nap to do something with Luca that we have a hard time doing while he is awake. It could be a trip to the store while one parent stays home. Playing Play-Doh. Or, her favorite, arts and crafts.

This is where I confess that I LOVE arts and crafts most of all. I sometimes push it a little over the other options. There's something therapeutic about sitting on the floor next to a littl kid, playing with markers and pipe cleaners and stickers and paint and glue. I love watching her try new things, and seeing her imagination unfold before my eyes. She loves to watch me make things and try to make them herself, and she is so full of pride when she completes a project. Our fridge, countertops, table, pantry door, and windows greet most Monday mornings adorned with new artwork, and it makes my heart swell up with pride to see her mind and her eyes and her hands working in concert to create and make things beautiful.



My favorite so far is a painting she did yesterday...purple paint on red construction paper. It didn't look like much of anything as I laid it on the counter to dry yesterday. But this morning I was getting ready to head out the door to take Luca and Rohan to my mom's, and she asked if she could bring a picture to Grandma. I said yes, and she grabbed the red one. Holding it up, she said to me, "See that mama? It's a little baby elephant. It doesn't have a long nose, though."

Puzzled, I asked her why the baby elephant didn't have a long nose.

"Because we're all sick, Mama. And the teeny baby elephant is sick too, and if he has a long nose, he's a lot of sick. So I made his nose little so he can just be a little sick."



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Watching the body of a baby uncurl from infant to toddler...from defenseless and needy to effervescent and independent.

Watching a toddler make connections and rationalize. Seeing her go from object to subjective.

Being priviliged to bear witness to these moments of greatness that peer out from behind a veil of ordinary, everyday family life typifies the parenthood experience. We are honored to meet them at their very first breath, to learn the meaning behind each cry and feel the bliss of earning their smiles. We feel small hands on our face as we feed them, on the tender backs of our arms as we carry them close, and someday grasping onto us and then rushing to let go.

We know the beauty of an unhinged laugh and the way our heart bounds into our throat when they make us proud. We breathe them and hold them and dream them and love them with a quiet ferocity. And sometimes, when we are very lucky, we see them make a connection for the first time and nudge one step closer to independence. And we hold on fervently to the moment, promising ourselves we will remember the way her hair is honey spun gold that swoops over her face and catches in her fairytale eyelashes. Or this way his smile bursts into a thousand points of light and radiates from within his little Buddha body.

I try not to look back too much. Not to spend too much time sorting through the memories of her first laugh (in the tub when she spotted rubber ducky) or his first steps (from Daddy to me and back again). You spend too much time looking over your shoulder, you're bound to walk into another room and not realize how and when you got there. So I focus on the moment or the day or the season and stare the future square in the face. Hands in the air, barrel-rolling and laughing the whole way.

Two exciting updates.

Update #1: Doula, or Dontcha?

Woman. Wife. Mom. And Doula? That's right, friends, it is now official: I am a DOULA! I spent 16 long and exciting and intense and sometimes emotional hours this weekend doing a training with DONA (Doula Association of North America) to become a labor doula.

I am very excited to take this step, and I came to it after a lot of thought and careful consideration. Ever since giving birth to Luca, I've been revisiting my former idea of becoming a nurse. I found pregnancy and childbirth to be incredibly beautiful and empowering times in my life. I enjoyed being pregnant quite a bit, probably in part because I got off fairly easy and didn't have any complications. But even more so, I found childbirth to be an amazing experience. Like many women in America, most of what I heard while pregnant was horror stories and warnings: "Labor is horrible...get the epidural stat!", "My friend's cousin tore from front to back!", "I'd love more kids, but I wish someone else could birth them for me.". It was enough to almost make me scared, but I managed to keep a positive outlook and approach it with the mentality that I was going to take things as they came and allow myself to experience it with an open mind. And I'm so glad I viewed it like that, because now I can say, without a tiny bit of hesitation, that it was amazing and beautiful. Painful? Yes, even with the late-in-the-game epidural. Slightly scary? Sure. But amazing and beautiful none the less.

After giving it a lot of thought, I decided I was not ready to commit myself to years of school and more student loan debt when I have a perfectly good Masters degree I can and do enjoy using. But I wanted to do something. Birth was so powerful and amazing, I wasn't prepared to just let it be something I experience a handful of times. So I looked more into my options, and came to the conclusion that being a Doula is the way for me.

What is a Doula? Well, good question. And I could field, it, but I'll let the experts at DONA explain:

"What is a doula? Giving birth to a baby is so much more than a physical phenomenon; it engages parents-to-be in a transformational experience, a key life event full of emotion and meaning. A doula who accompanies a woman in labor mothers the mother, taking care of her emotional needs throughout childbirth. A doula also provides support and suggestions for partners that can enhance their experiences of birth. A postpartum doula continues that valuable emotional support and guidance, helping a family make a smooth transition into new family dynamics."
source: http://www.dona.org/mothers/index.php

So now that I have done my 16 hours of classes, I am on my way! I can officially call myself a Doula now, but the road to Certification lies ahead. On the horizon: attending 3 births, a childbirth and breastfeeding class, and some paperwork. Once it's all done, I can proudly display those initials that mean I'm certified through DONA behind my name: CD(DONA). I'll keep updating more as I go along, but thanks to my friends who have encouraged me through this journey so far! I am so excited and consider myself honored to be able to be with women and their loved ones through this amazing life stage!!!

Update #2: 20 minutes that changed our lives.

We went out to dinner with my parents this evening, as we do most Sundays. I won't bore you all with the details of the hour and a half it took us to complete a meal we should have finished in 45 minutes (HELLO slow service!), but anyone with a young child knows they cope worse with endless restaurant waits worse than even the surliest husband ever could. So, as has been our routine lately, Luca got restless and we strapped on her little pink sandals and took her cruising around the restaurant lobby area. She's been getting stronger and better at cruising, only needing one hand or even a tiny pinky finger to hold onto for security and balance. So I walked around with her for awhile, letting go on occasion to see if she would take off on her own. No dice. She squatted right down every time, only to be grabbed by me before her hands could fit that (surely filthy) floor.

We got home, and our little Bird was ready to play. As is her usual M.O., she headed over to the stairs to hang onto the banister and climb up and down. So we were both sitting on the floor a few feet from her, and she was standing on the ground level, holding the banister. We called out, "Luca, come here!". She let go of the banister, and lifted one foot, moving it slightly without sitting down. We were SO excited. This was officially her FIRST STEP without assistance! But she wasn't done yet, because then she moved that foot two more times, pivoting in a circle while keeping the other foot firmly planted. Then she sat down and smiled, and everyone (Luca included) gave her a round of applause.

Feeling euphoric, we had her crawl over to us, and Darrick got her up to her feet. Sitting a few feet away, I called for her to come to me and...SHE DID! Yep, just like with crawling, she went from 0 - 60 just like that. Her first 'walk' was about 4 steps, and then she lurched forward and grabbed for me, unsure. I scooped her up and hugged her, and we praised her like mad (oh, to be a baby again and have everyone praise your littlest move or advance!). Smiling, she pulled herself up again. I turned her to face Darrick, he called to her, and she walked back to him. And a star was born!

It had only been about 20 minutes since she was nervously gripping my hand, unsure and afraid to try on her own, and here was our girl, toddling back and forth. The more times she completed this move, the more excited and pleased with herself she got, until finally she was laughing and smiling and clapping as she walked. Oh, what pride we all feel tonight!!!

Of course, I took a lot of videos, because I am THAT MOM. They were all done in dim light (it WAS 9 p.m.), and with our digital camera, so the quality sucks, but WHO CARES?!?!?! My kid is a walker!!!!! (PS: Sorry this video is sideways, but YouTube won't let me turn it around):





By the way, I SO think Update #2 is WAY more exciting than Update #1, but if I'd posted about the new walker in our household first, no one would have read about the Doula thing.

Baby Tricks.

THIS is why I bred....not for the sweet baby snuggles and tender newborn moments. Not for the precious widdwe footsie-wootsies and the soft baby cheeks. No, sir. Not I. I bred for Baby Tricks. And lately, Luca is full of them.

Trick #1: "Ahh Gah!" This is baby-speak for 'All gone!', what we say to her when she finishes eating a meal, empties a sippy cup of the last drop of milk, or when we hide something from her which we don't want her to have*. Or, you know, sometimes just because we like hearing her say it back.
Us: "Are you done eating Luca? All gone!"
Luca: "Ahhhhhh Gahhhhhhh!"
I mean, you don't get cuter than that.
*We're working on weaning from the Boppy (AKA her pacifier), and holy hell it sucks. She loves that little piece of silicon happiness....and I'll admit we do too. Any tips on weaning from the pacifier would be greatly appreciated!

Trick #2: Kisses. I love baby kisses. They are so stinking cute. So for months on end now, whenever I give Luca kisses, I say the word "Kisses!" to her. I thought she'd never catch on. And then, the other day, I was in the throes of horrid back pain, and she sat behind me on the couch and YANKED my hair. I responded with "Ow!", which she thought was funny, thereby prompting another yank. Not being able to cope in my pain-ridden state, I started to cry. I felt horrible about it, because I couldn't stop the tears and I was worried I'd freak her out. Instead, she climbed off the couch, stood by me, and leaned in to give me kisses!!! I started to laugh! I couldn't help myself - it was SO sweet! Of course, my laughing prompted her to laugh and then repeatedly smash her face, mouth open and drool pouring out, against mine time and time again. And you know what? It was ok. No! More than ok, it was fantastic. SO cute! And since that morning, she's our little Kissy Bug...giving kisses upon request 7 out of 10 times. Which, you know, is a better average than you need to graduate from high school in Arizona.

Trick #3: Little Growler. Darrick thinks it's hilarious to (gently) tackle Luca while she's on the floor and give her belly kisses. He makes this low pitched grumble/growl while doing it. Well, wouldn't you know it - - - the little beast has caught on. She growls back now...and it's so cute!!! Imagine this little blonde pixie baby growling at you for a moment and just TRY not to smile!

Trick #4: "Where's Your Button?" This one, admittedly, is a byproduct of her obsession with Piggy's nipples. She's taken to coming over and lifting our shirts to peek at our bellies, so we started pointing out our belly buttons to dissuade her from her mad quest for the belly nipples we just can't produce. Whenever she lifts our shirts, we say, "See my button, Luca?", and point to our belly buttons. She smiles. So we started lifting her little shirt in response and asking where her button is. She caught onto this really quickly, and now when you ask her where her button is, she lifts her shirt and pats her little tummy.

Trick #5: High 5! This one doesn't need much of an explanation, and is still a work in progress, but we are getting there!

So, all you women out there who are on the fence about breeding...take note! Once you get past the "Why is my newborn insane and why is it that she seems to hate me so?!?!" phase, you can teach them tricks. Next on the list? "Get mommy a cookie" and "Taking the dumpster to the curb".

My baby is 11 months old.

Just don't try to talk to me about this, because I am likely to have an emotional breakdown. What the hell? Wasn't she JUST born????

Anyhow, it's been another busy month. We went to LA to visit my Grandma. We celebrated my Mom's 65th birthday. We had lots of busy weekends and took tons of walks to enjoy the nice Arizona evenings while they are still here. Soon they will be gone, and opening the front door at night will be akin to opening an oven set on 425 degrees. The only good side to summer approaching so soon is baby swimming pools and swimming suits.



We also celebrated St Patty's Day and Easter, both of which required new outfits.







Now that we have a crawler, she is into everything. She's forever climbing up and down the stairs and climbing on things and petting the dogs and...and...and...it's never ending. The plus side is, she sleeps like a champ. And, she's got 2 lower teeth now, so her food choices keep getting more varied. She's almost entirely off purees, since she seems to think those are for BABIES and she's not a BABY so she wants chunks of food. She is also now officially weaned from breastfeeding. It went a lot more quickly and easily than I had anticipated. Part of me misses having that connection to her and that time with her. But I know it was time...her interest was waning fast, and those teeth never made a connection but they sure did threaten to once or twice. I must admit, though, I got an ego check when weaning her. I was pretty worried she'd fight weaning and miss me. Ah...no. Not at all. She adjusted like a champ. I will say, as well, that I do NOT miss pumping. Not one teeny, tiny bit.





In other big Luca news, she has a new favorite word: apple. She says it in her little munchkin voice, and it's so cute I want to wrap that word up and put it in my pocket to save for later. Then, when she's 14 and all angsty, I can pull it out of my pocket, unwrap it, and remember when I used to think her being able to talk was so freaking cute.

So, that's about it in Luca Land for her month 11 update. Next month she will be a year old, and I will either feel immense pride at making it that far or I will lock myself in the bathroom every evening for a week straight, crying and lamenting over my baby growing up.

It took forever, but...

....Luca has leg chub.

We have a crawler.

Since she was about 6 months old, everyone has been asking us the famous question: "Is she crawling yet?". The answer was always no. While Luca perfected the army crawl well before Christmas, she seemed to have little to no interest in doing an ACTUAL crawl. Our theory was that she was either too lazy to push off the ground, planning on skipping crawling entirely, or just thought crawling was for babies and clearly she was a Cool Kid and not a BABY.

Anyhow, last night I was sitting on the floor and Luca was about 5 feet from me. I needed to change her diaper, so jokingly I said "Luca, get up and come over here so I can change you." And, wouldn't you know it, she got up on hands and knees and CRAWLED to me. Crawled, as if she'd been crawling this whole time and what in the world were we so excited about because duh mom and dad crawling is totally what the cool babies do now.

We were cracking up. And then this morning I told her 'nanny' about it, and she just smiled at me. I was like 'Oh my god..she's been crawling for you this whole time, hasn't she?!?!' She just smiled and said 'I didn't say that.'

Stair Climber

Since I am inept at posting a video, here are a few 'sports composite' shots of Luca climbing the stairs. This is a handy feature our camera has, where it takes 16 shots rapidly in succession. Please note that since I turned the camera vertical, you need to read this like you are Japanese....start in the upper right corner and go down the column, then go to the top of the next row.

10 Months Old.

I have a 10 month old. I have a 10 month old.




The scary thing about this is, I almost have a 1 year old. Holy hell.

Anyhow, this last month has been a flurry of activity and milestones for Luca. First, she finally figured out how to get herself sitting upright. For the longest time, she didn't seem to understand how to get from lying down to sitting.





Once she had that down, she quickly progressed to pulling herself up with ease. She has always loved standing and been pretty strong, but until she could sit up on her own she wasn't very good at pulling herself up. How quickly that changed: she has officially ordained us both as human jungle gyms.



She also learned how to climb up the steps. Yes...you read that right...UP the STEPS. We're so screwed. It's actually pretty adorable, though, because what she does is plays a game with herself. She'll take her bop (pacifier for those unfamiliar with Luca-language) or a toy over to the bottom of the staircase. The she pulls to standing, using the bottom step for leverage. From there, she reaches up and places or tosses the bop or toy onto the second step. Then, she climbs onto the first step, reaching for the toy. Once she has it in her hand, she puts it on the next step and goes up again. I'm quite convinced she'd keep this up for more than 3 steps, but I'm too freaked at the thought of her tumbling down 5 or 6 steps to let her try. Fortunately, she is a genius and has also learned how to back herself down to the floor. Sometimes, she gets back to the first step, lies on her tummy, and slides off the step. She has also taken to climbing through the rungs of the barstools in the dining room and trying to get onto the couch to see the 'Dod' (dogs). (photos or video of the stair-climbing to come soon)







She's also extremely obsessed with 'sharing'. That typically means she tries to hand us food or her pacifier. And it typically means she wants us to put these things in OUR mouth. Yum.



The other things Luca has started to do: clap, wave, and screech. I just got back from a work trip to D.C., and I had a layover in Chicago for a night. Lucky me, my good friend Mere lives there, so I got the chance to hang out with her for the night. In keeping with my tradition for traveling without Darrick, I stopped in a gift shop in Midway and got him a shot glass (funny side note: I always get him shot glasses, and they rarely, if ever, get used). I also picked up a gift for Lu. They were selling those stuffed monkeys which have velcro on their hands and feet so you can attach them to something. I got her a yellow one wearing an "I <3 Chicago" t-shirt. Well...fast forward to when I get home. I give it to her, and she loves it. She chews on it's face and flings it around (add throwing things just so mommy has to pick them up to the list of new milestones reached) and snuggles it up. So there I am playing with her and the stuffed monkey, and I touch it and it begins to SCREAM! It's clearly intended to be a monkey sound, but instead it sounds more like someone's being attacked by the monkey. Despite my unease at the monkey holler, however, Luca LOVES it. The monkey screams 3 times in a row, and whenever you press his belly to set him off, Luca screeches right along. Baby Genius, I tell ya. I also got her this t-shirt, which I know some of you will appreciate very much:





We did some fun activities this month, including going to the Rennaisance Festival and the Phoenix Zoo. The weather is SO amazing here right now (I know, I know...all your cold-weather people will be rubbing it in my face come June)!









The other big news in Luca's world is the breakthrough of her first tooth. It happened when I was in D.C., but this is one milestone I'm not that sad about missing (sorry, D). It is the CUTEST little snaggle, right up front, and she's doing really well with it. I am a little sad, though, because I know this means the Gummy Smile is officially a thing of the past. I loved that Gummy Smile, and wanted to say goodbye to it with a photo montage of sorts:















And, of course, her love for our other 'kids' remains strong. And they remain naughty.



FYI, if you ever wonder how I can tell when my dogs did something naughty, it's because they look like this when I come home:



Here are other random pictures from the past month: