I Can't Work Today.

I'm alone in the office, and I have a to-do list, but I just cannot work. Here's why:

- It's almost Christmas. I've been out of both money and time lately, which means I've yet to start shopping. This would panic some people, but it's sort of our norm to shop in the last 2-3 weeks before the holiday anyhow, so I'm not panicked. I am, however, the proud owner of a toddler who 'gets' Christmas for the first time, which excites me and makes me want to buy EVERYTHING FUN I can think of. And nothing at all. I was just reading a post on Pacing the Panic Room about this, and it SO hit home. We have a small house. We have enough toys for a preschool full of kids. I am kind of sick of toys and toys and toys. I've already put in the request with family to keep it simple this year. "What does Luca want?" I get asked. Boots, art supplies, and books I answer. I find this works: keep it simple for people and thereby for yourself as well. For her birthday last May, anytime anyone asked what she wanted I responded, "Art stuff and outdoor toys and puzzles and books." And basically that was what she got. We've been blessed with a kid who is not into TV, is content to drag around the same naked Cabbage Patch she got for her first birthday and 'breastfeed' it, and who cried when I threw away a carboard box the other day because, "THAT'S YUCA'S CAAAAAAAAAR!". I hope to keep her this unencumbered by the need for moremoremoremoremore as long as possible.

So this year, on the list, we're thinking a wood play kitchen and some accessories for both kids. I've asked the fam to keep it simple with clothes, books, puzzles, art supplies, and the like. My mom has the sewing genes, so I've requested from her a homemade sling and diapers for Luca to use for 'her baaaaaaby' (make the end of that lilt up in a sing-songy voice). And that's it. For Rohan, I'd love some wooden blocks, which my husband amused me to no end by offering to make by hand. I'd LOVE for him to make them by hand but between teaching, coaching, and being a hubby and dad, I doubt he has time. Plus, I prefer his thumb attached to his hand rather than removed via hacksaw.

- I think I broke my big toe. Remember the blog about Averting Pootastrophe? If not, you should read it because, well....it's pretty funny. Decidedly LESS funny was the eerily similar circumstances of last night, wherein the dogs shat on the carpet in our hallway upstairs (serious? we have TONS of tile.), and I scrubbed it clean. And then Luca followed me upstairs and in attempting to amuse her and keep her away from the wet carpet, I let her jump on my back, lost my footing, and slid down 3 steps.

I landed with my left leg bent under me in an odd little angle, and when I moved it pain shot from the toes to the knee. Mommy instinct kicked in and I both avoided profanity (apparently I let out a, "HOLY MOTHER OF (pause pause silently mutter fuck pause) shucky darn!" which just goes to show what a stellar mom I am when the chips fall...haha) and crying from the blinding pain. When I fell Luca ended up on her feet 2 steps behind me, perfectly fine but with her little toddler brain ready to soak up any profanity and tears I had to offer. I think I managed to utilize my experience with natural childbirth here, as I realized I was mentally removing my self from the physical pain to the point where I was able to very calmly ask Darrick to move Luca out of the way and bring me a Tylenol and some water before the pain got worse.

I spent the next 2 hours with my foot elevated, icing it off and on. I had to crawl up the stairs and hop on one foot into bed (oh yeah.), where I propped a pillow under my foot, popped two more Tylenol, and went to sleep.

I was able to semi-walk on my foot this morning, enough to get myself and the kids ready for the day and drop them off at Gramma and Grampa's then get to work. But the longer I'm up and the foot is down, the more swelling I am feeling and the harder walking is getting. There's no real bruising, but the big toe hurts, the next 2 toes are semi-numb, my ankle and foot are sore, and there's quite a good amount of swelling.

- It's Friday. This weekend I had big plans which included Zoo Lights, a farmer's market, shopping, maybe the Mill Ave art festival, and driving up north to cut a Christmas tree. I cannot focus.