Monday, April 19, 2010

12 Over, 10 Off.

My BL challenge with friends is over, and I finished it off by hitting my 10 lb. mark.


Yes and no.

I am happy those pounds are gone, and happy to see smaller numbers when I step on the scale. I'm thrilled that I not only dropped the weight I had put back on last week, but also lost another pound + this week.

But on the other hand, I'm disappointed that's all the loss I've seen. I'm frustrated that the weeks I've followed WW to a fault I've not lost more than I have during my less-stellar weeks. I'm annoyed that my body looks to same as it did 10 pounds ago. I let myself down by not pushing harder.

And then at the same time, I know it's far from over. I know I will reach my goals...every last one of them little loss by little loss. Because I'm doing it for myself. For my hubby. For my kids.

I will hit my first goal very soon (this week?) and when I do I'll check it proudly off my list and move on to the next. I know it's going to take a long time, and I've accepted that. I've worked hard to make the changes from the past 12 weeks into a lifestyle, not a routine aimed at quick weight loss. While I'll admit to being tempted several times to cut out carbs, go on a cleanse, drink only Slim Fast Shakes, or use some other absurdly unsustainable method of weight loss, I have not caved. And I won't. Instead I will suffer the slow loss, bitch and moan until my readers stop checking my blog on Mondays (::wink::), try to replace self-loathe with self-confidence, and carry on.
I'm so close to my first goal I can almost taste it! My plan to get there is simple: I've dropped 2 points off my WW target since starting, so that alone should help. I'm going to track my points daily, keep on getting in that active time (in the past week we did the zoo, walks with the kids, and yoga....and I think those 2+ pounds I chased away are proof that activity will kick things up for me some), and take time for myself. When I'm well rested, happy, and keeping my mind in a positive place, I do much better!
I'm going to try posting a weekly goal list for myself, just so I can check back on it next week and see how I've done. So for this week, I aim to:

~ Get outside and get active at least 3 evenings
~ Do yoga at least twice
~ Drink all my water every day (an area I've been slacking in, which I KNOW makes a huge difference)
~ Track my food every day and aim for my target points without dipping into the flex points
~ Work off any flex points I DO end up eating by walking the stairs in my house and doing stretching and strength exercise
My weight loss goal for this week is 2 pounds. I really truly believe I can do it!

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